Thursday, August 29, 2013

Lois Lane just can't be trusted with a camera.

The Camera from Outer Space
Superman's Girl Friend Lois Lane
DC Comics
Cover Art by Kurt Schaffenberger
Story by Otter Binder
Art by Art Kurt Schaffenberger
Number 57

I know, it seems like I would be doing the cover story to this issue of Superman's Girl Friend Lois Lane. Lois spanking a baby Superman whose thought bubble reads like Bizzaro? But no. I'm doing another camera story!

I'll just say here, because I do go on, that I love photography. I even prefer the whole antiquated process of rolling your own film, darkrooms and those pungent chemicals that can cause sterility. *sigh* With digital, photography lost its charm.

With that said, Lois Lane should never touch a camera. In her hands they NEVER seem to perform in the way they were intended. First, Gay for Lois Lane featured a story where her camera produced images of Superman no matter who she photographed (here) - normally I would just write that off as a user error - and now we have her with a camera that helps capture bad guys. Perhaps if the camera was a little more cuddly Lois would dump Superman for it!

I never really saw Lois as the bring an invalid dinner  type. Perhaps it's the deafening tick of her biological clock causing her to act in such a maternal way.

Am I the only one that finds this carnival ride kind of distrubing? I also think if there was a ticket booth to ride Superman, Lois would have been first in line.

I don't know exactly what the gift of a bandanna says about a relationship but I'm willing to bet it doesn't say anything good.

"... so that's why I bought you this gift." What? Why? Why did you buy that gift? Why didn't they included the part of the conversation I wanted to hear?!

On a side note, who paid for that billboard? Superman's ego or the worse police department ever?

"Oh, my goodness! What made me shake my head "no"... and risk being shot?" I'm going to guess bipolar disorder.

Wow! As always that was quite a ride! And Superman claims to convinently understand everthing. Oh, except how to get the genie camera back. Guess Superman will not have to share all the glory. Am I the only one not surprised?

Perhaps someone just needs to buy Lois a nice reliable Nikon.

Friday, August 9, 2013

Friday, February 15, 2013

Death House Honeymoon - Well at least you can say you've been married!

Death House Honeymoon
Superman's Girl Friend Lois Lane
DC Comics
Cover Art by Curt Swan & Murphy Anderson 
Story by Robert Kanigher
Art by Art Saaf, Ross Andru & Mike Esposito
Number 105

Okay now, don't be a dick. Like you've never been so lonely that you caught yourself trolling online prison personal ads. Well, perhaps not.

In Death House Honeymoon once again we see that Lois Lane inspires devotion in every one but Superman. I beginning to think that our Man of Steel really doesn't deserve the undying loyalty of little Miss Lois Lane. Okay, so maybe undying is a bit of a stretch, but she if far more loyal than I would be under the same circumstances. This story also acts as an awkward introduction to the character The Thorn whose own dedicated story follows directly after this Lois story.

I can't help but think that a guy by the name of Johnny Adonis would be far better looking.

It's a man's job! I'm glad we cleared that up.

If Lois can't even drive down the street without nearly getting killed, how is it that Superman ever gets anything done?

Never mind "Crazy Collins", Miss Lane! He is one of the 100! A paid killer! He has no respect for anyone on earth! ... He's also really horny and you are kind of dressed like a tramp.

I'll do anything to repay you! That's a you can bang me face if I ever saw one.

Funny, if I were in Johnny's place and I had Lois' unbreakable word, there would be a whole hell of a lot of requests that would top the list above marriage. 

Speaking of dressed like a tramp.

I'm your wife! Oh honey, that never works.

And I'm left with a sensational eye-witness scoop of marriage and murder! Wow, way to shake off Johnny's death. 

What a story! And I'm sure no one is surprised to find that a woman like Lois can bring out the good even in a cold blooded killer.